‘Yahoo Boy’ or ‘Civil Servant’: The rush and the crush among the youth

By Ganiu Bamgbose, PhD

There is something increasingly troubling about the relationship between young people and the idea of success in contemporary society. Beyond the legitimate desire to make it in life, there appears to be an unhealthy impatience with the process of becoming. Many young people want the rewards of success but have little tolerance for the demands of the journey. They want the destination without the discipline of travelling, the harvest without the patience of planting, and the applause without the sacrifice that makes applause worthwhile. This tendency is becoming more visible in the choices they make, the values they celebrate and the standards by which they assess other people.

Recently, I came across an online street interview in which some young ladies were asked whether they would rather date a civil servant or a Yahoo boy. Interestingly, a good number of them opted for the latter. While street interviews are not necessarily representative of the opinions of an entire generation, the responses were nevertheless revealing. They invite us to reflect on a society where the proceeds of questionable wealth sometimes appear more attractive than the dignity of legitimate earnings. The question, therefore, goes beyond whom someone would prefer to date. It is about what our society has come to value and what the younger generation is gradually learning to admire.

Of course, there is nothing inherently glamorous about being a civil servant, just as the label of a civil servant does not automatically confer integrity on its bearer. Civil servants, like people in other professions, have their fair share of good and bad individuals. Neither should every person who appears wealthy be automatically classified as a fraudster. However, when the choice is deliberately framed around a legitimate salary earner and someone whose wealth comes from internet fraud, the preference for the latter becomes a disturbing commentary on our collective value system.

Perhaps the problem is not entirely with the young ladies who made such choices. Perhaps it is also with the society that has made wealth more visible than the process of acquiring it. We live in an environment where expensive cars, designer clothes, exotic vacations and extravagant celebrations are increasingly used as evidence of having arrived in life. Social media has further intensified this culture by turning private achievements into public competitions. People are no longer merely interested in making progress; they want everyone to see that they are progressing, even when the appearance of progress is all they have.

This is where the rush begins and the crush follows. The rush is the impatience to become successful without allowing life to take its natural course. The crush is the disappointment, frustration and sometimes moral compromise that follow when reality refuses to meet unrealistic expectations. When young people measure their progress against the carefully curated lifestyles of others, they begin to consider their own legitimate journeys too slow. A person earning a modest salary may begin to feel unsuccessful because someone of the same age is displaying millions of naira on social media. A young graduate undergoing professional training may feel left behind because a peer has acquired expensive properties through questionable means. The danger is that the pressure to catch up can gradually erode the distinction between what is desirable and what is acceptable.

It is important to remind ourselves that success is not a race in which everybody must arrive at the same time. Life does not operate according to a universal timetable. People have different backgrounds, opportunities, challenges, responsibilities and seasons of growth. Some people become established in their twenties, others in their thirties, forties or even later. The fact that someone has not achieved a particular milestone at a certain age does not mean that the person has failed. There is a difference between being delayed and being defeated. There is also a difference between making progress and merely appearing successful.

More importantly, the process matters. The process of acquiring an education, learning a trade, developing professional competence, building a business, cultivating relationships and establishing a career is not a punishment. It is part of the education that success itself requires. The experiences gathered along the way often become the very resources needed to sustain whatever is eventually achieved. A person who acquires wealth without developing the values and discipline required to manage it may find it difficult to sustain that wealth. Indeed, the ability to make money and the capacity to build a meaningful life are two different things.

This is why young people must learn to prioritise values over valuables. Honesty, diligence, patience, integrity, discipline, responsibility and respect for human dignity may not always produce immediate financial rewards, but they provide the foundation for enduring success. A society that celebrates wealth without asking questions about its source risks raising a generation that is more interested in having than in becoming. Yet, what a person becomes is often more important than what the person possesses.

There is also a need for parents, teachers, religious institutions, government and the media to reconsider the messages being communicated to young people. We cannot continuously celebrate people for their material possessions while ignoring the principles that should guide the acquisition of such possessions. We cannot condemn corruption in public discourse and privately encourage our children to associate with people whose questionable wealth offers them immediate comfort. Values must be taught, but they must also be demonstrated. Young people need role models whose lives show that it is possible to achieve success without compromising one’s conscience.

This is not an argument against ambition, financial independence or the desire for a comfortable life. Young people should dream boldly, work hard, seek opportunities, innovate and aspire to better standards of living. There is nothing noble about poverty, just as there is nothing inherently virtuous about struggling unnecessarily. However, the pursuit of a better life should not come at the expense of the values that make life worth living. The question should not merely be whether someone has money, but whether the person has acquired it through legitimate means, can account for it and can live with the conscience that accompanies its acquisition.

Ultimately, whether a young lady chooses a Yahoo boy or a civil servant is a personal decision, but the values informing that decision have wider social implications. We must be careful not to raise a generation that considers patience foolish, integrity old-fashioned and legitimate labour an indication of failure. A society cannot build a sustainable future on the glorification of shortcuts.

Life is an evolving process, and progress is not always dramatic. Sometimes, progress is a salary earned honestly, a skill acquired patiently, a business that grows gradually, a degree completed through hard work or a family sustained through responsible living. These may not trend on social media, but they are meaningful achievements.

The rush to arrive must not become the reason we lose our sense of direction. And in our desperation to avoid the crush of delayed gratification, we must not embrace the disgrace of compromised values. After all, it is better to arrive late with one’s integrity intact than to arrive early with a lifetime of explanations to offer. Success should not only be measured by how quickly we get there, but also by what we become, what we preserve and what we can proudly account for when we eventually arrive.

Everything called success must have its process and progress. We all must avoid the type of rush that leads to crush.

(c) 2026 Ganiu Bamgbose writes from Lagos.