Why we travel 530 miles so our son can have a haircut
Why would you travel 530 miles for a haircut?
For Al Nicolau and his wife, Ramona, the answer is simple.
Seven-year-old Alex, who is autistic, dreaded a trip to the hairdressers, “shaking and jerking” whenever he needed a trim and fearing the noisy environment of chatter and dryers.
His parents Al and Ramona Nicolau discovered the Blade Inclusive Salon, in Lowestoft, Suffolk, which specialises in haircuts for clients with neurodivergent needs.
Despite moving from Norfolk to Aberdeen in 2022, they still make the 530-mile trip to Suffolk four times a year – coinciding with visits to grandad – so Alex can have his hair cut at Blade.
“We pop down at Easter, in the summer, in October, and we pop there at Christmas time,” says Al, whose son used to be non-verbal.
“It works so well and he’s so calm. He actually wants to go there for his haircut, whereas up this way we haven’t found anywhere quite as good.
“Other places can be a bit of a fight and battle – but the sensory room at Blade has made a massive difference.”
The Blade Inclusive Salon, owned by Caroline Parnis, has been operating for almost 20 years. She created The Sensory Studio within it about seven years ago.
The space includes fidget toys, cars, animals, books and projections on the wall.
She says the idea was to create a relaxing environment away from the overwhelming main shop floor – to put those with additional needs at ease.
Her customers now travel from Kent, Norwich and Bury St Edmunds, Dartford, King’s Lynn and, of course, Aberdeen.
“It’s not just the haircut, it’s the sensory issue of the hair falling on them and the gown, and using clippers is also a big thing,” Caroline adds.
“I tend to start off with the scissors and then hopefully we can progress – it’s about trying to build that relationship and trust with someone.
“The clients always normally have come from a very traumatic experience [of having their hair cut], so it is about breaking those barriers down.”
Where Alex previously had a “meltdown” during haircuts, he now enjoys them.
“If he gets upset, oversensitive, or overstimulated, he could walk off with half a haircut, which then looks terrible,” Al says.
“But Caroline moves around as the kids move or jerk their heads and she goes with the flow – that’s the real key thing for us, plus the calming setting of her studio.”
Gary Newman’s 14-year-old son Oliver is autistic and non-verbal.
He says Oliver would often become overwhelmed and “lash out” when hairdressers tried to cut his hair.
Oliver lives with his mum in Sudbury, so Gary does a 210-mile, six-hour round trip from Lowestoft every time he takes his son for a haircut, but he says it “is 100% worth doing”.
“We’ve gone from dreading a haircut, not knowing what he would be like, to him loving going there,” he says.
“Initially, we had to hold him on the chair but now he will sit down – that’s the trust he has built up with Caroline over the years.
“We are eternally grateful for her.”
Before finding Caroline eight years ago, some hairdressers – according to Gary – were too “terrified to go near” Oliver’s hair because he might catch them with a flailing arm or leg.
But now, “he sits down, runs around a little bit, takes his top off as he doesn’t want hair on his clothes, and then sits down,” Gary says.
“It’s absolutely beautiful to see, and now he asks when his next haircut is and puts it in the diary.”
Hayley Ingram, 43, of North Cove in Suffolk, has taken her son Noah to the salon since he was five.
Noah, 13, has severe non-verbal autism and sensory processing disorder.
“Noah doesn’t take to many people, but he took to Caroline – she just makes him forget that he’s having a haircut,” Hayley says.
“We’ve been going every six weeks since, and he now goes into the big salon. If you’d have said that when he was five, I’d have never believed it.”
Before, the teenager “could not tolerate” being in a hair salon.
“Life with a disabled child can be so stressful and haircuts used to be one of those big stresses,” Hayley adds.
“The noises were too much, the environment was too much, and we’d have to leave.
“But now there’s no fear, no anxiety; it’s just a lovely experience.”
In the UK, more than one in 100 people have autism and there are at least 700,000 autistic adults and children in the UK, according to the National Autistic Society.
Children and young people who are on the autism spectrum often find getting a haircut distressing, due to it being a highly sensory experience, they say.
Caroline said she became more understanding after her own daughter was diagnosed with a rare form of epilepsy at the age of six.
“Me and these parents, we’ve been through so much, and there are a lot of tears, because sometimes it can take years before [their children] sit in that chair,” she says.
“So, to have that child give you a hug, a kiss, or a high five is the most amazing feeling.”
Between January and the end of April, Caroline, who has ADHD, carried out 284 sensory haircuts – but the Sensory Studio isn’t just for children.
She has also opened The Eden Room, a separate area for anxious clients of all ages.
“There are actually a lot of ladies who really struggle with getting their hair cut,” she adds.
The salon has been nominated for a National Diversity Award and, Caroline says, hairdressers are “thinking more about how to make their salons more neurodiverse friendly”.
She says: “I’m hoping to open up a barber academy and do courses from here.
“Hopefully over the next year I can realise some of those dreams to raise that awareness.”
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